Texas,  United States

Trouble in Texas

After spending the last 5 days on the move every day, with at least 3.5 to 4 hours of driving per day and another two days of the same ahead of us, plus TWO time changes within an 8 hour time frame (ie: messing with the sleep), I was in NO mood for not one but both psycho bitches (GPS and Google) to take us the worst possible route AGAIN, this time 5 mins into our trip on Monday morning.

We had some rain the previous night and the bitches thought it’d be a good laugh to take us down a sand “road” instead of the paved road that leads directly to the interstate we needed to be on.  The result … within minutes of turning onto the “dirt” road (which looked fine before I drove on it, not even a puddle in sight) – wheels were spinning and van sliding in the quick sand. Can’t move forward but apparently can move sideways and the back of the van heads toward the ditch and the 4 foot sand bank on the right! Leaving us at a somewhat of a precarious angle with the wind howling for good measure.

There was much swearing but fortunately help was not far off – called Road Bear who called a towing company. Were warned that they may have to come from Amarillo – so could be up to 3 hours before they got to us.  Fortunately, they found someone closer …. Unfortunately that still took an hour and a half (despite GPS co-ordinates, they couldn’t figure out where we were) and then one of their trucks got stuck in mud en-route. More bad news – the guy that arrived was in a tiny jeep type thingo!!!??

He tried (with zero success) to pull us out and then called his boss – his side of the conversation went something like this …

The whole f*cking road is soft as f*ck!
For f*cking miles!
F*cking miles from the f*cking highway!
She’s already in the f*cking ditch!

…and a whole heap more f*cks and f*ckings 😊

We’re chuckling to ourselves at this point ‘cos it’s not really our problem anymore, but the thought did occur that if his truck is stuck, and he can’t get us out, the only solution may be to spend the night (or two) here waiting for the road to dry out!

He then left to tow their other truck out of the mud and returned about 30 mins later – the said “truck” not really much bigger than a ute.

Poor guy’s “jeep” was COVERED in mud, side mirrors, wheels, everything! But with van in drive, he managed to pull us back on to the “road”, then with van in reverse – pulled us backwards up the road to a “proper” road. Not before I managed to steer the van into the ditch on the OTHER side of the road though! Poor bastard obviously drew the short stick this morning 😊

So, three hours later … were on our way again and the poor guy has not only his vehicles covered in mud but him too from having to kneel on the ground to attach the chains.

Before he left us he asked “Where you headed?”, when I told him – “GPS bring you this way??” (looking kinda incredulous). Don’t get me started mate!

Made a stop in Lubbock to get the van washed and arrived at our spot for the night at 5.45pm – our latest arrival yet. Fortunately, sun only goes down at about 8pm.

6 Comments

  • Diane Cooper

    It looks like such an innocent road to drive on too! I’m not a fan of the GPS – give me a good old road map any day!

  • Patricia Forner

    Holy S___! What a horrible experience, but then, you are travelling in Trumplandia, and all I can say is that I am glad you were mired down in the mud, not the s— that the American public has to put up with these days. Hope that this is the last of the “bad” for you two. Love your commentaries and photos. Stay safe, out of trouble, and away from the Carona Virus! We are going through toilet paper wars here at the supermarkets.

  • Christopher Urtz

    Let’s see here. You were only a few days removed from the Breaking Bad extravaganza. You two were in an RV. In the middle of nowhere. Just saying – a couple of YouTube videos, modify a few pots & pans & suddenly you two are the re-boot of the series! Then again – you couldn’t actually drive out. Yeah, forget this idea.

    FYI – you’re now entering the belt of the US where enormous steaks are on offer. If you eat one, you get your picture on the wall. And maybe a T-shirt. Make sure and get the XXL. You’ll need it after trying to eat 5 lbs. of cow. Continued good luck!! (And this goes without saying, but stay healthy!)

  • Anonymous

    OMG girls!!!! My heart was hurting for you as I admittedly laughed through the commentary😬 What an adventure! So colorful! I could place myself in the scene( but regretfully I would be one for one with the f*cks and such😳 You have each other- the very best company! You can weather(poor word choice?)anything together and with a measure of grace and humor♥️ Keep on trucking and allow us to live vicariously through you! This is my now favorite blog of all time😘😘

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